housewarming

for the record, the cake reads: Sorry for peeing on the futon.

i cannot make this stuff up, folks.

the whole concept of "housewarming" went a bit far. passing out and peeing yourself on the furniture is pretty high up there on the list of greatest party fouls you can commit. right up there with setting the host house on fire...

check and check.

whatever, it's still a really pretty house and we may forgive you one day.

not soon though.

pong

this is a pic of my sister and her boyfriend playing ping pong:



more importantly, this is a pic of the free ping pong table we picked up friday night from mclean, va.

dom and i were trolling craigslist at about 3am thurs night/fri morning, as we're wont to do. he stumbled upon this little beauty and convinced me to go for it. i thought it would be a nice addition to our new place in dc, but seeing as it's gynormous, it has instead found a new home in the basement of minority court.

i'm a little more than addicted.

in conclusion, i love ping pong and free things in general.

may 31, 2007

dear friend,

today i finally had time to sit down and read the perks of being a wallflower. it's cristy's copy. all her favorite parts are bracketed in black ink and have little comments like "aww" or ":)" and sometimes ":(" they're not necessarily long passages or quotable quotes. some of them are just words or phrases that jump out at you and make you think. make you smile. make you nod your head in some type of acknowledgment of a shared experience.

here are some of things she bracketed which saved me time from doing it myself:

- we accept the love we think we deserve.
- if he didn't leave, it would never be his life. it would be theirs.
- i want to make sure that the first person you kiss loves you.

the last one was bracketed, awww'ed, and unhappy-faced.

it's cute and kind of like her own way of participating with the book.

i like how the main character's name is charlie. i don't know why i like that name so much.

if you haven't read the book, it's about growing up and the angst of adolescence, friendships that make you feel infinite, and the quirks of a loving family. there are also bits about sex, drugs, and alcohol. check, check, checkity, check. kidding? i wish there were someone like Bill to encourage me to write an essay about the book and to tell me that i'm special. but i graduated from college 1.5 weeks ago and probably will never have to write an essay ever again.

reading the book brought back a lot of memories. not just about high school but also college and life in general. i wonder if it's normal to always feel like you're on the brink of growing up. i didn't have a pen to add my favorite part to this worn out copy, but i dog-eared the page where sam repeatedly encourages charlie to live in the moment. i think that's part of the epilogue.

i'm not really sure what i'm doing with my life or where i'll be next year or even next month. instead of being worried or stressed-out, i like the idea of living in the moment. i'm going to try to do it.

i'm sorry that this letter has taken such a digression. what i really wanted to say is: i have not left the house in three days, but ironically i am still homeless. this temporary move back home post-grad is slowly sucking the life out of me, but i do enjoy waking up at 2pm.

love always,
me

happy mama's day

i was checking mom's email last night, as per request. i noticed an old email from sis that she had sent to mom. it was marked as read, but mom never replied to it. so 10 days later (mother's day) i decide it would be a good idea to reply to sis' email from mom's account b/c it would make her day that mom is thinking about her on this special day:

my dearest cristy,

today is mother's day. thank you for your gift of NOTHING. i'm sorry i ever gave birth to you.

xoxo,
mom

ok, so i didn't really sign it "mom" but used my name instead. good thing too b/c apparently sis is way insecure.

her response to me:

why are you always messing with me??! my jaw kind of dropped when i read that and i was like holy shit why would mom write such a mean email.

can you sense the panic in there? i can and it makes me feel warm inside. roflcopter.

the moral of this story? tell your family you love them. then mess with them a little. rinse and repeat.

ontd.

so it's 2:44 AM and i'm lying here in bed frickin' spooning knifing with my 27-year-old brother in a hotel in nyc.



notice how the knives are straight and do not at any point intersect.

sick bastards.

sis graduates from nyu at 10:30AM. no, we are not twins.

mom and dad are in the next bed over, snoring in unison. i've turned on my ipod in an attempt to drown them out. there's something more than a little unsettling about knifing with my brother while akon's "i wanna **** you" plays in the background. if i weren't so lazy, i'd jump out of bed and throw up a little.

damn you, uncensored version!

/shake fist

i have two final projects and a story to turn in before i can even think about celebrating my own graduation.

hmmm...it just struck me that maybe i still have two final projects and a story to get did because of the fact that i've already started celebrating?

whoaaa consequences!

joint graduation/joint bday (mom's and kuya's) bbq at our place coming up.

we're threatening to have those inflatable sumo wrestling suits and other things that perpetuate asian stereotypes.

karaoke????

in conclusion: i told kuya that if i wake up to his spooning me, i will straight up pop him in the face.

just kidding. i loves my family. have i said that lately?

little girls are evil

i'm not sure when, why, or how this idea originated, but i'm convinced that little girls are evil. i've thought this for a while and have been open about my hesitance toward my own uterus bearing demonic mini-me's. i might just pull an angelina and hand pick my own accessory boy child, if only to safeguard against evil little girls.

in an attempt to not write this final project required for graduation, i've compiled a short list of examples as to why i think little girls are evil:

5) Dolly Dearest -



ok, so technically Dolly Dearest is--well, she's doll--but whatevs. watching at age 7(?) any movie about the spirit of a devil child from the ancient devil-worshipping Sanzia tribe that takes over the body of a mass-produced child's doll is bound to fuck you up a little, yeah? and ok, so Dolly Dearest is a poor man's Chucky, but the fact remains that little girls are evil.

4) Angelica Pickles -

is that make-up and eyeliner? i smell teenage pregnancy and future homewrecker. you grew up too soon and never had a childhood because you were always taking care of your little cousins? mommy didn't have enough time for you? wah wah wah. suck it up and keep it closed you little scag.

3) Raven Baxter - you're not actually on the evil list because you're too grown. i think inherent to the definition of evil little girl is the fact that one still be a little girl. nevertheless, you're psychic and super powers of any kind = the win. so...really i'm just giving a shout out to that's so raven.

2) Sanjaya Malakar -




oops, honest mistake. my apologies...


and finally the #1 influential factor as to why little girls are evil:


1) because it's cute when they are.




so finals are coming up and then graduation. i expect a few months of unemployment to follow as well. naturally, that means mandatory procrastination updates.

ooohhh, yeaaaah.

to whom it may concern:

i went into the basement to use your computer and couldn't help but notice, that between the empty beer cans and stale plates of pizza, stood a half-used bottle of KY water-based lubricant.

having not yet touched the computer and accompanying keyboard, i found this discovery more than slightly amusing. admittedly, it was 2am and my need for a computer was not that pressing, so i decided i'd pass out on the couch and toss around accusations tomorrow.

wake up and complete my unfinished business re: computer usage. apparently, the same thought had crossed your mind since the ky bottle is now MIA.

moral dilemma: 1) confront or 2) dismiss.

i'm a jerk; i chose the former. of course, i'm also as graceful as a dead moose, and i approach with, "so...saw your lube by the computer last night. discuss."

you pull a clinton on me and deny, deny, deny but there's something in the way your facial facade cracks, and that half-smile/half-laugh contortion you try to hide alludes to a deep seeded shame.

be shamed!

or, you know, just own up to it and i'll promptly stop.

afterall, awkward moments are only fun when they make others uncomfortable.

holla.

you know you're a mess when:

you go to see the doctor for your TOE but come out with prescription codeine for viral bronchitis.

the directions say 2 teaspoons every 6 hours or as needed. lacking a teaspoon, i've guesstimated that 2 swigs straight from the bottle every 4 hours would suffice.

also, i had another point to make in this entry, but i can't seem to recall.

bus 32

i met a guy on the bus today. straight from work, i hopped on the bus and fell, yet again, slightly in love.

his red and green jacket matched his wool cap, and his pin striped pants dangled precariously above his ankle socks and boots. funny guy. as soon as i boarded the bus, i knew i wanted to sit next to him. not that there were many options, but his smile was inviting.

we sat in silence for about 9 seconds but ended up talking the rest of the way. it must have been at the half-way point when he dropped something about wanting to take me out to dinner.

of course, i laughed.

his response was to laugh and then raise the offer to dinner and movie.

1) i didn't know laughing was a bargaining tool.
2) i don't know how i managed to sidestep that one, but i did.

we kept talking for the rest of the bus ride, and he would bring up the possibility of a date every now and then. i finally broke and asked, "how old are you, gary?"

"63," he says after a moment to tally up everything.

when i grow up i want to be spry and full of life.

he told me that he spent today hanging out in mcdonalds. when i asked if he was there with his friends, he said no. he likes to sit there and look around/watch people.

then he asked me out for a drink and told me about a time he went to a bar and the waitress took his $5 bill for a $4 beer and didn't bring him back his change. "she tried to be sly!" he accused. "so then i took that dollar back and gave it to the other waitress."

haha i love it.

it was awkward when it was time for my stop. i shook his hand again and told him to stay young. gary kept saying that he hoped to see me again. i pushed the stop request button near the back exit, and stood there for probably less than a minute, but it seemed so long.

he kept turning and looking back to see if i was looking at him. i finally gave in and looked and we laughed at the awkwardness of this goodbye.

i take the bus everyday, but i don't think i've ever had that much fun or laughed so much. gary honestly made my day. every now and then i start to feel a little jaded and it's always energizing to find that genuine, nice people still exist. i wanted to take a picture of gary just to prove it, but lacking a camera, i promised to write it down instead.

gary said i had a great personality, and that it would get me far in life. i was embarrassed because i was thinking the same thing about him, but hadn't the nerve to say it. i wanted to tell him that i'd be his friend. we could hang out at mcdonalds together -- people watch and talk shit on the customers. we could even share fashion tips since he was so into my scarf and (admittedly) it was his festive wool cap and jacket that lured me to sit next to him.

or maybe it was his smile, the kind that lifts your cheeks up so high that your eyes disappear. it was followed by a laugh so full of soul, sight had no choice but to give in.

new year & new plans

dom has a sense of purpose to which i can only aspire. if only we were all lucky enough to know which way we're going. happy new year.

12:18:35 AM hoyadom: i have sorted out some stuff
12:18:42 AM norefundaisle: yeah? what's the update
12:19:20 AM hoyadom: my top U.S. cities (if i do stay here): 1. San Francisco 2. Denver 3. Seattle 4. DC
12:19:34 AM norefundaisle5: ohhh what do you like about seattle?
12:19:46 AM norefundaisle5: aside from that season of real world, i mean
12:19:50 AM norefundaisle5: and why is it higher than dc
12:19:55 AM hoyadoms: well, i've been watching grey's anatomy a lot
12:19:57 AM hoyadoms: and it looks pretty
12:20:13 AM norefundaisle5: no you didnt
12:20:15 AM norefundaisle5: NO YOU DIDNT
12:20:28 AM hoyadoms: also, i think i want to be surgeon
12:20:30 AM hoyadoms: just saying